Laws of the House of Our Land
I’m reading Samuel Shem’s newest work, The Spirit of the Place in order to review it. Stay tuned for my thoughts on this newest work from the famed House of God author. I will say that maybe I’m in the mood for some silly but accurate medical rules; since the new book doesn’t contain any, I think I’ll make up a few of my own.
Laws of the House of Our Land (ᓄᓇᕗᑦ = Nunavut)
1. Have a shower while on-call, and the phone will definitely ring. Then you’ll be outside in -40C with wet hair.
2. It’s not TB until it’s TB. And even then, it might not be TB.
3. You have to die of something.
4. A B-hCG is positive until proven otherwise. Even if the patient has had a Tubal Ligation.
5. There is no placement.
6. It’s not a MedEvac until the plane has landed.
7. Don’t draw the d-dimer.
8. Informed refusal is just as good as informed consent. Just be sure to write it down.
9. Never go out without your snowpants on.
10. Show me a nurse who doesn’t suggest an x-ray and I will bow and kiss her feet.